Breaking up is hard to do

So I get this text message from some guy saying he’s sending me a package.

This is major.

It comes with a picture too that I’m supposed to click to find out what it is.

Just as I was wondering recently if loving spicy food would make me a hot mama, it seems someone is indeed smitten with me and has a cute little surprise for me in the mail. Those last few fresh chillies I had for lunch must’ve done the trick.

I’m curious, of course, seeing that this text message is coming from a number I do not recognize and I’m almost tempted to click on the picture. But no!

So he gets really impatient and starts calling me… and calling me. And I’m not picking up. I know it’s him. I recognize his number from the text message.

Such a shame I don’t pick up calls from random numbers. Or click on random links.

My phone keeps ringing off the hook all through lunch. Can’t a girl have a bite to eat without her phone burning up??

Okay, this is driving me nuts.

I have to take his call.

“Hello, Caroline,” he starts in a dreamy voice. And when I say nothing beyond my initial hello, he continues, “Caroline?”

Oh my gosh, his voice alone is enough to melt a woman’s heart. Even a mom with 3 teens, bwahaha!

“Who?”

“Caroline, is that you?”

“I’m sorry but I don’t love you any more,” I say tearfully. “Please stop sending me stuff and don’t call me. I’m not in love with you any more!!”

The stunned silence on the other end of the line is earth-shattering.

At this point, Hip2bDaughters burst out laughing out loud right there in the middle of the mall.

“Mom!!??? OMG, the poor guy, you’ve scarred him for life! We don’t even know who he is!!”

“Probably some company checking up on a customer delivery. 😛 But someone had to put him out of his misery, right?!”

Okay, so sometimes my sense of humor does go into overdrive.