the uninvited

oie_round_youre_invited_bwI’m constantly amazed at the things people come up with these days. I know many of you notice these things too but may be too polite to blog about them.

Speaking of politeness, sure it’s good except we seem to be going in the opposite direction. These days, people make no bones about handing you a wedding invite and then telling you NOT to bring your teens. Not that we even make it a habit to bring our kids to weddings. We understand they take up extra seats and sitdown dinners are expensive.

As a sidenote, even when my kids were toddlers, they were never a problem at formal dinners or when eating out. They would sit there and quietly eat along with us. They never left the table to race around or scream after other kids or throw temper tantrums, so the issue of them disrupting an event never arose.

Anyhow being that this is a family member we’ve been visiting very often and who’s mentioned the upcoming wedding to us more than once, I guess I just assumed we’re ALL invited. No? Okay, my bad! Maybe I’m a little outdated in this respect so I was very surprised when told pointblank that my teens are not welcome at the dinner.

I guess it’s their prerogative but the way I was brought up, it’s not a done thing with close family. Being tactful people, we know we shouldn’t bring our entire neighborhood and their cat either. So that’s never a problem for us.

Sure I understand dinner at the Marriott and honeymoon at the Cozumel Mexico does cost a fortune but hey, if you can afford it, what’s three more guests? Know what I’m sayin’ 🙄 ? Still if folks are looking to profit from a once-in-a-lifetime event like this, maybe they should just start selling wedding tickets instead of handing out wedding invites, huh 😯 ?

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  • Karen

    It is a touchy subject that we ran into this past summer when our son got married. At $50 per plate, we had to let a few people know it was not okay to just bring the grandkids.

    • clairity

      I understand that it’s okay in certain cultures but according to Chinese custom, telling people not to come is considered rude 😛 . And quite often, people these days are more interested in trying to recover the cost of the banquet than anything else.


    Relatives all welcomed!! As for friends (note: not BUDDIES) – too bad, they just have to come without the kids, not that we don’t welcome them, well, at least,in my wedding case – not enough seats!! REALLY!!

    • clairity

      Ya, that’s what I thought too, all relatives welcome. At my wedding, we let everyone (relatives + friends) bring their kids. Except I had some gate-crashers too, a friend (not buddy) brought her entire Church group and occupied a whole extra table and brought no gifts! The nerve of some people 😯 !!!