I’ve just dropped Steev off at his college prom at a six-star hotel, no less! Yes, isn’t it grand how kids, who haven’t even started making their own money, are dressed to the nines, dining and dancing the night away at an event that cost their parents a freakin’ 100+ bucks per head!?!

At around this time last year, Steev’s secondary (high) school prom was also at a hotel and it cost us another small bomb! Money doesn’t grow on trees, ya know and I wish the schools and colleges would impress that on our very materialistic generation of kids instead of leading the way.

Steev is hardly the party animal and he doesn’t really care if he goes or not. He just gets a big kick out of playing photographer. As for me, I get a big kick out of seeing my son looking all grown up in his father’s tie and dress shoes !

Tonight he let me kiss him on the cheek when we stepped out of the elevator at the hotel ballroom. I was pleasantly surprised when he bent over and offered his cheek. Normally I’d just squeeze his arm so as not to embarrass him in front of his friends.

But hey, tonight’s kiss was nice, it gave me a warm feeling. There’s my son, bigger and taller than me now but still my baby .

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Well, that’s it, my baby is finally done with primary school! We collected her upsr results from school yesterday and I just came back from her school’s prize-giving a short while ago.

Eighty-nine students from her school took the exam and she’s one of the 17 who got straight A’s. We’re so proud of her. You should’ve seen her big old grin when her brother and sister congratulated her, such a baby, goo-chi, goo-chi.

Skye only took one tuition class but she’s very disciplined and does her work without me having to sit on her all the day. I just cook all the good food and make sure she’s well-fed .

We’ll be going out to celebrate (more food, gah!!) and she gets to choose where she wants to eat. My kids don’t get any monetary reward for their achievements. Instead they have to make do with intrinsic rewards.

Our policy, they work for those A’s because they want to do well, for themselves, for their own future, not because they’re going to get paid for them.

So no selling those A’s to us, we ain’t buying. No X amount of money multiplied by the number of A’s they score. Well, maybe just a teeny-weeny gift to make them happy although Daddy tends to get carried away sometimes .

We always feel a bit uncomfortable when our friends ask Steev “so what books are you reading now?” and Steev would just shrug the question off with an inaudible mumble under his breath, an answer I always hope our friends won’t hear .

Truth is we’ve been trying to get him to read without much success, or so we thought. Steev and Raine were both early readers. Before age 3, they were able to read simple Peter & Jane books and were progressing nicely up the number series and onto Enid Blyton books.

Skye started late because I was so busy with the two older ones and she always being the ‘baby’, I didn’t realize she was already 3 and still couldn’t read a word!

Today, Raine and Skye are my two bookworms always reading, always hungry for more books. Steev, on the other hand, has probably read all of two books in his entire school life.

I only realized recently that we’ve probably wrongly accused him of not reading when all this while, he’s been soaking up technical and technology articles on the internet. Okay lah, bad mommy thought he was only playing games!

Today I read in The Star that many of our schoolkids read only two books a year! It’s a shame, too many distractions competing for their attention these days. The trick is to start them young and consistently build on their interest from there (how to get kids to start reading?).

I did it the hard way but it really doesn’t have to be that hard. Funetics actually has a phonics-based Early Reading Program that’s not only a great place to start but also lots of fun for both parent and child.

It also makes a valued Christmas gift, or anytime gift, for friends with kids. It contains 81 lessons from early letter recognition to preschool concepts to reading and writing.

Like I always say, each child is different and this kit contains lots of interesting games and activities to suit your child’s learning style and allows you to pace the lessons according to your schedule and his/hers.

The printed version comes with a free audio CD of the program. You can try out 3 lessons for free. Shipping is available worldwide and it’s free for those living in the US.

Many working parents don’t have time to figure out how to get their kids interested in books and a guided program like Funetics is just the thing to get started.

This school term has barely ended, and already tuition teachers are asking me to confirm my kids’ spots in next year’s classes. Yes, they do start early and they’re making a kiasu (scaredy cat) out of me! Seriously !

Unlike many parents, I say blek to tutors with proven A track records because some use the wicked stepmother approach which I’m so against.

A’s are nice and a great bragging point for parents but not when they’re forced out of the poor kid!

Personally I prefer tutors who create an active interest in the subject and take the trouble to explain things through simply and clearly. I’d be crazy to pay someone to kill my child’s interest in learning, won’t I?

My kids have done okay so far with minimal tuition. One or two classes, that’s all. Like I always say, no point cramming their growing years with tuition and more stress after school. If they can manage or if I can help them, there’s no need for tuition. I find kids try harder on their own and when they’re not just wait to be spoonfed.

Our rationale for tuition is based on how the subjects are taught at school, and how confident the kids are about doing well. I use their grades and their feedback to assess their tuition needs.

Come to think of it, I hardly had any tuition in my time and I turned out okay. See? But I know some of you will jump on me and say, yeah but things were different then, it’s so much more competitive now.

True, but at least we got childhood memories to share with our kids and their kids from our rocking chairs. I wonder what our over-scheduled kids these days will remember of their childhoods? Childhood? What childhood?

The latest hero in our family is *drum roll please* DH!

Yesterday he saved a two-year-old girl from choking on a piece of soft candy.

He was hanging around the reception area of his office (well, apparently he does work sometimes ) and noticed this little kid gagging and rocking her head backwards in distress!

DH alerted her mom who was sitting there looking pretty and totally unaware that her kid was choking! Her mom panicked and burst into tears. Well, I don’t blame her, it would’ve scared the daylights out of any mom!

Quick as a flash, DH picked up the little girl, tucked her under his arm and started racing to the nearest clinic with his staff and the mom running close behind.

Since the girl was so small, it was almost impossible to grip her under her diaphragm from behind which is what experts recommend. The candy, being soft and sticky, would’ve been much harder to dislodge. That was DH’s biggest worry.

As he ran, he tilted the little girl upside down in the hopes the candy would come loose and fall out. I think it worked. The candy dislodged itself and the girl started crying for her mom. Definitely a good sign because she couldn’t make a sound before!

Poor kid must’ve been wondering why she was going on a marathon race tucked like a baseball under this man’s arm . By the time they got to the clinic, the candy was already out and the girl was crying from the sheer sight of the doctor (must not have been a very good-looking doctor)!

His job not yet done, DH darted across the street to buy an ice-cream to cheer up the kid whose life he’s possibly saved. And yes, it’s all in a day’s work for our superhero (when he works, he really works, ok? )!  We’re so-oo proud of him!

So moms, be very careful about giving your toddlers soft, sticky candy like Sugus or gummy bears. Our ex-pediatrician also warned us about giving kids whole grapes and rambutans. These are common choking hazards so either avoid them or cut them down to small pieces.

After I picked Raine up after her exam ended at 9:30am Friday, we headed to the mall. Just her and me. We haven’t done this girls’ day out for quite a while now so it was kinda nice.

We had Auntie Anne’s Pretzels for breakfast. Of course, we chatted non-stop . That’s really the nice thing about going out with Raine. We have so much to talk about.

We did a bit of window-shopping since we had so much time to kill before going to pick Skye up from school. But we didn’t buy anything because we wanted to wait for Skye. It’s no fun shopping without Skye.

Just before we left the mall, Raine suggested we make black pepper lamb chops again since her Daddy missed this last weekend!

I don’t take kindly to people saying that moms who stay at home have nothing better to do than paint their nails or go shopping all day.

To all the friends, ex-colleagues, even family members who think, and sometimes even say it out loud to my face, yes, you guys piss me off.

But I’m too tired to pick a fight today. Instead, I’m going to list out what I did yesterday to give you a taste of what a typical Friday for a mom of 3 teens is like.

Warning: Do not try this at home. This is extremely hazardous to your mental and physical health and may mess up your simple mind.

5:00AM - Alarm clock goes off. My mistake, I clicked the wrong alarm setting on my PDA phone. Try to get back to sleep. Couldn’t. My mind just keeps going through my schedule for the day.

6:00AM - The usual breakfast rush. DH drops off the kids, then comes back to pick up his luggage for a business trip.

7:40AM - Work out at gym for 1.5 hours.

9:15AM - Home to change out of my gym shorts and pick up some stuff to go to the bank. Banks are what I consider hostile zones, gotta cover up. I don’t want the men at the bank to drop dead from heart failure seeing me in my gym shorts.

10:05AM - Wait in line at the bank, only to realize I’m at the wrong branch. OMG, what a waste of time!!

10:40AM - Second in line at the right bank but just how long does it take to withdraw a few measly dollars and update a savings book?

11:15AM - Do some quick shopping at Tesco while waiting to pick up Skye. Tummy growling like crazy since I didn’t have time for my second breakfast after gym.

11:45AM - Wait at Skye’s school, munching muruku to keep from fainting from hunger .

12:10PM - Set Skye to make her own ham sandwiches while I have a quick shower. Been stinky since gym .

12:30PM - Rush out to pick up Raine from school.

12:50PM - Finally get to have my two ham sandwiches and a cup of tea. Then go online to quickly check my emails and read a bit of news.

2:30PM - Rush to pick up Steev from college and then head straight for DH’s office downtown to pick up something. Luckily I packed two curry puffs and a bottle of iced water for Steev because he has irregular lunch times depending on class breaks. Reach home at 4:00PM.

5:00PM - Send Raine to tuition in the pouring rain. By the time I drop her off, it’s storming so badly I decide to wait outside her tutor’s house instead of driving all the way home.

I spend the time crunching almonds in the car and making phone calls home to get Steev and Skye to turn off the modem and to look in the fridge for something to eat if they’re hungry.

8:00PM - Finally we’re home after one whole hour in the massive traffic jams everywhere. I needed to go to the bathroom badly and had been holding my poor bladder till I was going to burst!

I have not prepared dinner. Earlier I’d promised the kids we’d go out for a quick burger for dinner. But by the time I get home, I swear nothing was going to make me go out again. So we end up eating sandwiches again since it was too late to cook!

This has been a long post just as it had been a long day yesterday. But I still say this beats working in some cushy office getting paid to do practically nothing all day except drink coffee, socialize and surf the net in air-conditioned comfort!

You know how when we run into friends we haven’t seen in a while, they always look at our kids and marvel at how much they’ve grown. It’s strange how we never seem to notice how our own kids have grown but it takes someone else to see it.

This morning, as I watched Steev get ready to attend a launch, I was suddenly struck by what a handsome young man he’s grown into. Okay, maybe I’m a little biased here but… wasn’t he that little baby in my arms just yesterday?

Today my 17-year-old is wearing a long-sleeved dark-colored shirt and pants with his spiky hair all gel’d up and looking for all the world like a grown man, and I had to swallow hard and blink back a few tears (of joy).

Steev runs his own business. Today’s the first time he’s been invited to a product launch by a multinational at a five-star hotel. And they said he could bring along a staff member.

That really cracked me and his Dad up! Staff? Since one of us would have to chauffeur our CEO downtown, Dad decided to tag along as his ’staff’! The things we do for our kids!! I guess in many ways, we’re growing up with them.

Wendy wrote this comment on my previous post, “Your kids are the quiet type? ALL of them? How did you manage that?”

Um, I’m not sure really but yes, I can honestly say my three kids never ran around the store or threw tantrums if they didn’t get what they wanted.

They never asked to buy anything. In fact, it was always DH and me who’d ask if they liked a certain toy or book and offer to buy it for them.

They never fought over things. Maybe it’s because we never told them this is your book or this is your toy, so it’s understood that whatever we buy is meant to be shared.

I’m not a particularly strict disciplinarian, at least not in the sense of brandishing the cane. Practically every Asian household with kids has a cane though.

I had one too, kindly provided by a well-meaning aunt who says if I’m ever to raise good kids, I must have a cane. Well, don’t tell her but I’ve never used it and I can’t even find it now .

I’m not sure how it all worked out so well and I wish I had tips to share. Thing is I didn’t consciously set out to ‘tame’ them but along the way, I probably did something right .

Whoa, this must be the quietest weekend in a long while. True, my kids are the quiet type, even when they were little, they never run around the shopping mall or jump on the furniture or scream and fight with each other.

Still, this is a very quiet weekend even by our standards. All my three kids are in exam mode which means everyone is supposed to be doing their own revision with minimum social interaction. I check in on them periodically but for the most part, they’re on their own.

Kids these days are very different from us in our time. I used to get more panicky as the exam date drew near. But these kids, they’re counting down the days, they just can’t wait for the exams to come and be over and done with.

But just between you and me, I’m the most nervous one of all. My two older ones tell me I’m such a worrier and that it’s all going to be a breeze. Yeah, if I can honestly believe that because when I was preparing for my exams during my time, I was nervous as heck!