Humor & crazy stuff » Hip to be Mom

I’ve done it again. Made another boo-boo. I dropped Raine off at her early morning class and took the wrong way home. Don’t ask me how I can get lost on a route that I’m on every single day of the week. Don’t even ask !

But yeah, it happens. I’m not sure if it’s ever happened to you, but if it has, I’d love to hear about it. It would make me feel a whole lot better .

Point is, if I didn’t do silly things like this, where would I even find the occasion to laugh at myself, right? Laughing at other people when bad things happen to them is unacceptable. But laughing at yourself, now that’s different and it’s good for your psyche even.

But I digress. Back to how I turned up a blind ramp onto the highway and there was this oil truck doing some stunts and everyone was swerving to avoid it. With all this confusion going on, I somehow ended up on the wrong lane.

Fine, I was a little distracted and it was only when I made the turn that I noticed the scenery wasn’t quite familiar. Apparently I wasn’t alone though. Seems like the car in front of me made the same boo-boo! What a laugh!

So I drop in at the college library after class today to borrow a couple of books. Me in a library? Now that’s almost unheard of! These days, there’s nothing I can’t find on the net, right? Wrong! Long story short, I really have to get my hands on those books. So it’s not like I have much of a choice.

I push the glass door open and step in gingerly. Madam Librarian at the front desk eyes me through the top of her reading glasses. I spot the electronic turnstile and head for it. The little light on it is red. Now I don’t know about you but to me, red spells danger, stop. So I hesitate, my hand gripping the card hanging round my neck.

I can feel Madam Librarian’s eyes burning holes in my back. “Tap with your card!” she commands from her post behind the counter. I look back at her, she nods and repeats her order, making no attempt to keep her voice down. Last I remember, libraries are where you can actually hear a cotter pin drop, no?

The turnstile rolls and I’m in. Whew! Now that wasn’t so bad! Okay, so what now? I must’ve said it out loud because I see her motioning me to a hidden door that leads to the teacher’s book area. So what it is about restricted areas that they makes them so restrictive in space as well?

The aisles between the book shelves are obviously made for teachers the size of supermodels. Now I’m no supermodel and I’m carrying 2 shoulder bags and trying to make my way down a book aisle that’s the width of a hair. And before you can say “ssshush”, I’m bringing books crashing down from the shelf behind me. Oh no!!

I can almost imagine the look on Madam Librarian’s face. Hurriedly locating the books I need, I head for the exit hoping to make a quick getaway. I head straight for the exit marked OUT in big bold letters. Next thing I know, the alarms start going off and I’m standing there between the two electronic posts with yellow lights twirling on both sides of me!!

Madam Librarian looks none too pleased, and almost drops her reading glasses as she reaches down to deactivate the alarm. Apparently there’s another exit which isn’t wired and it looks just like the swinging doors at a cowboy saloon. Like I said, I’m pretty rusty around libraries. Either that or I’m a complete klutz!

The girls and I’ve been doing a ton of baking lately. Blueberry cheesecake, holiday biscotti, chocolate chip cookies. I have an electric mixer but I wanted to give my arms a good workout. Look what happened…

We just got back from the mall and let me tell ya, it was packed! There was a big sale going on and we didn’t know. Well, now that we do most of our shopping online, there’s no reason to keep track of what’s going on in real life.

We figured we really didn’t have anything to buy except maybe more nail polish?! To quote Raine, one more color, or four, never hurt anyone. This then is her “very humble” collection . With today’s 4 new additions, she needs a bigger box to accommodate them all *bah*.

So we were milling around in the crazy crowd being bumped around by folks who clearly have no concept whatsoever of personal space. While I was engrossed with trying out some nail colors, one lady practically glued her body onto my back as she attempted to squeeze between me and the clothes rack. Guess the words “excuse me” don’t exist in her vocabulary .

Never mind that. Another surprise was waiting for us as we turned the corner to the memory foam mattress section. There standing right behind Raine was our neighbor’s DIL (who, by the way, also lives next door with her husband and kids)… with a big toothy hi, no less! I swear my jaw dropped to the floor even as I struggled to utter my most neighborly hi in reply!

Here’s a woman who has never acknowledged us in all the years she’s lived next door! The only 2 occasions she’s ever spoken to me on the phone (like we were old friends?! *gag*) were when she desperately needed to get in touch with her MIL (a really nice lady, btw) and their house phone was out of service! That’s it!

Here’s a woman who peeks over our fence to see what I’m wearing, and then soon after, I see her wearing something similar. Ultimate fail! I don’t know what it is with her – is she competing with me, or is she just a fan of my fashion style? Well, she can try… but she sure don’t have my cute J Lo butt, so there!!

And yes, this chance meeting with my biggest ‘fan’ really freaked me out, big time! If only all my neighbors were THIS warm and friendly! No, seriously, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, love the woman *shrug and * !

Racing with Murphy

Posted by Clairity Comments Off

Nov 282011

The girls and I have been mostly cooped up at home all weekend. I think we may well have run out of malls to crawl, if that’s even possible and we’ve moved on to greener pastures? That’s a story for another day. In other news, the weather’s been weird this year. Anyone noticed that?

This is the morning sky that greets us as we head out to the gym just before 7:00 in the morning. For all intents and purposes, it looks like the beginning of another blazing hot day in Tropical unParadise.

By early afternoon, the grey clouds are having a face-off with the white. It’s hot and sunny up till this point so it’s anyone’s guess which way the weather will go.

By late afternoon, there’s no mistaking who is winning. Thunder is a lot like labor contractions. The first rumbles are spaced fairly far apart. As the flashes and growls grow closer and louder, the skies unleash bucketfuls sending us on a mad scramble to unplug our precious modem before it gets fried.

Today we raced through groceries hoping to beat the rain. But Murphy beat us by 20 seconds. But of course! It was pouring elephants and tigers when we got to the exit. We’re city folks which makes us terribly impatient. We couldn’t just stand there like normal people and wait for the rain to ease up.

We had to make a run for it, make a mad dash to the car with our just-bought tissue boxes over our heads. That’s us ! Smack in the middle of the downpour, we were throwing everything (except the eggs!) into the back of my minivan and just as we were pulling away, the rain trickled to a bare drizzle! Thanks, Murphy, that’s real considerate of you.

Always a blast

Posted by Clairity 3 Responses »

Nov 182011

Have I ever mentioned what a blast I have with the classes I teach? Truth is I do, and this time, it’s no different. I have a class of students from far-flung countries. It’s a mix of college kids and adults in their 20′s and 30′s. I have a guy who works in real estate and another who is never far from his medical computer.

It’s great. Even as I’m teaching them English, I’m learning about their countries and cultures. I usually get to class early and as the students start rolling in, some of them would come up and chat with me. It’s a great opportunity for them to practise their English and for me to get to know them better.

I get asked some pretty wild questions which often center around origins and families going way back to the why’s and wherefore’s. Now that’s gotten me wondering about my grandparents and great-grandparents, and that whole ancestral bit – seriously .

We had a class about food and one of the guys offered to take me to lunch to try the food from his country. On and off, someone would offer me a small snack before class. Between the bag of M&Ms I brought to class yesterday and the speed word game we had afterwards, I think we’re all good for a great start to the weekend.