to the cosmetics promoter who…

… jumped out at me at the drugstore yesterday,

Yes, I know it’s your job to help customers make a biased choice. But please, please don’t jump on me from out of nowhere just as I’m reaching to have a closer look at that eyeliner. I don’t know if you recognize me or not but this is the second time you’ve scared the living daylights out of me.

See, I’m someone who prefers to dally and consider all my choices before making a selection. And I prefer to make that selection without a sales promoter breathing down my neck, thanks.

You people talk too fast. You confuse me. And it really gets to me when your answer to all my questions is Yes! Is this on sale? Yes! Will the eyeliner stay on a whole day? Yes! Can I use it to write on the whiteboard when my whiteboard marker runs out of ink? Yes! See what I mean?

Okay, so great, you tell me this crayon eyeliner won’t smudge and it has this cute little sharpener in the back. Nice! But you know what? I really don’t appreciate your drawing lines on the back of my hand with each color . It took me several hand washes to get it off!

You know, if you hadn’t done that, I might actually have bought that new-fangled crayon but since you chose to annoy me instead, don’t blame me for making a hasty exit without buying anything. Probably another day when YOU aren’t around to breathe down my neck.

Signed,

Shop-Stopped