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Quite often, people get frustrated with me because I don’t seem to answer their phone calls or text messages. Hey, folks, I’m really sorry, I swear I’m not avoiding your calls. I would answer if only I could just find my phone or remember to switch it on .

My first cellphone was the one my company made us carry. So like it or not, I had to lug that huge, fugly thing with me and keep it on 24 hours a day even though my job description didn’t include being night watchman watchwoman. So me and cellphones never actually got off on the right foot, know what I mean?

Then there’s my perpetual problem of never being able to get to my cell phone quickly enough to answer it before it goes dead. It’s worse if I’m driving. I tried wearing a Bluetooth headset which made me feel like an alien from planet Pluto, so out it went!

By the time I left my job, cell phones had gotten considerably smaller, sexier and even harder to find in my big bottomless tote bag. With 3 school kids to juggle, my mentality has always been: don’t call me, I’ll call you unless there’s an emergency in which case just text me and I’ll get back to you within the next 30 days or after all my kids are married, whichever comes first, thanks .